Mr. Christie is the head of the Christie household, a family in the British suburb of Wellington Green. When his wife is seduced by the mysterious French sailor Ramon, he decides to investigate, only for himself to be seduced, leading to gay sex on a live television documentary about his talking dog. In his shame, he starts to dig a hole from his home in the UK to Australia, abandoning his family, the local priest, and his morals... First part in a feature-length trilogy based on Phil Mulloy's "The Christies" shorts.